Couples Therapist Shivani Sadhoo Explains How to Know it’s the Time to Take the Next Step
The dating game can be difficult, so when you meet someone and it simply clicks, it is not a surprise that you would want to commit to a lifetime together. Sadly, a relationship going well is not the one and sole indicator that you are ready for marriage. So, how can you know? If you had a crystal ball—and you believed that it will work—you would like to gaze into its depths and ask but one question: “Should I get married?” Opines Shivani Sadhoo.
Deciding whether you are ready for marriage is one of the biggest decisions you will ever going to make. To help, you Delhi’s leading marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares tips to learn the signs you are ready to tie the knot.
You trust your partner
The ability to trust each other is the base of any successful relationship. Sans it, you might have love, but your marriage will be fraught with tension. “This is so important,”. “Just, think of any healthy relationship you have in your life, from a special one to a business partnership. Is there trust?”
You feel safe with them
Feeling safe and secure within the relationship will save you years of heartache when you are married. “The base of this begins with lack of judgment,”. “Can you be yourself around this person? If you are attempting your best to be someone else, we would encourage you to imagine what that will feel like for years to come. The impact on your self-esteem and anxiety this could create.”
Your goals match
Your lives rarely follow one straight route —they wind, twist and turn. Do you know where you are headed? And, more essentially, have you had the talk with your partner? It is difficult to be on the same page when you are moving in different directions. “You do not need to have the same goals but if you can help each other for the benefit of your relationship then you are in a good place. Being open and honest about this right from the beginning could avoid a lot of frustration down the road.
You have seen difficult times
Probabilities are, you will face certain stumbling blocks in life, so it is vital to consider whether or not you and your partner are ready to battle them hand-in-hand. “Yes, unproblematic love and joy in a relationship will always be a beautiful thing,”. “However, tackling a difficult goal together could build so much strength and trust in your marriage.”
You like who you are around them
Observe how you act and feel when you are around your partner. Is it a real version of yourself that you like? “A compatible partner will be able to bring out the best in you,”. “They push you to become a better version of yourself and can encourage you to a positive outlook on life.”
Both of you put an effort into the relationship
Are you playing a one-sided game of tennis? If you are putting all the hard work in and getting little in return, you may want to put a hold on the wedding bells. A successful marriage is never one-sided. When both individuals are willing to put in the work it is a great sign that you are ready for marriage.
Shivani Misri Sadhoo is an internationally recommended relationship Counsellor by world’s biggest and most trusted study and research-based foundation for couples therapy – Gottman Institute. She is trained on specialised key relationship counselling Skills from AIIMS, VIMHANS and various other reputed institutions. Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo, is also Certified for Emotionally Focused Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy.
Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo is also a Certified Neuro Linguistic Practitioner with specialised training and experience in the field of affairs/betrayals, trust issues, difficulty communicating, conflicting values, bereavement, grief and loss (affairs, separation, divorce, childhood) and emotional health issue (anxiety, social anxiety, fear, depression, low mood).
Currently, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is one of the top counsellors with the HIGHEST Success Rate with over 17,000 happy couples and individuals (based in India and abroad), who has benefited from her therapy. Psychologist and Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo not only practice independently from her clinic in Greater Kailash, Delhi, India but also listed on the panel of eminent hospitals like IBS Hospital – Institute of Brain & Spine, Express Clinic, Fortis (formerly) based in Delhi.
