Everybody likes attention. It makes people feel valued and appreciated, which boosts their self-confidence and self-esteem. Attention from others can also help them feel connected to others, which is a crucial part of being happy and fulfilled. For example, a simple compliment from a colleague or friend can make an individual feel seen and appreciated, leading to an overall boost in their mood.
However, too much attention can be overwhelming and even lead to anxiety. People who are introverts or who generally prefer to have more personal space may feel uncomfortable with too much attention. It’s essential to find a balance that works for each individual person. This kind of behavior may arise due to loneliness, insecurity, low self-esteem, lack of social skills, jealousy, narcissism, and other mental health issues.
So, what are some of the tell-tale signs of an attention-seeker? Let’s find out from Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s top relationship expert and marriage counsellor.
· Seeking constant validation: Some people love being praised and flattered even if they don’t deserve it. They want to be the center of attention. This kind of narcissistic trait could be due to an underlying lack of self-confidence and can be a sign of low self-esteem. Therefore, these people must look beyond external validation and work to build their own self-esteem in order to lead healthy and fulfilling lives.
· Exaggeration: Often, attention seekers feel they cannot gain admiration and respect through their own merits, so they resort to exaggeration in order to be noticed and appreciated. They may sensationalize their own successes or inflate the importance of minor accomplishments to draw the eye of their peers.
· Dramatic personality disorder: Attention seekers are often overdramatic in their display of emotions. They may be overly flirtatious, excessively talkative, manipulative, and often act impulsively without thinking much about the consequences. They must be treated with compassion and understanding, as their need for attention is often motivated by a deep-seated feeling of insecurity and low self-worth.
· Self-pity: Attention seekers often use self-pity to gain sympathy and attention from others. They may exaggerate or fabricate stories in order to draw attention to themselves and make others feel sorry for them.
They like playing the victim, blaming others for their problems, and taking no responsibility for their own actions. This helps them avoid facing reality and the consequences of their decisions, and can lead to a feeling of helplessness and a lack of personal control.
· Obsessed with ‘likes’ on social media: Attention-seekers are obsessed with ‘likes’ on social media. They are constantly looking for validation from others, even if they are complete strangers. The number of ‘likes’ they get on a post can provide them with the gratification they are looking for. This can lead to a dangerous cycle of constantly seeking approval from others. As a result, it can become a habit for attention-seekers to put their value in the hands of total strangers, with the intention of receiving positive feedback.
Final thoughts
There could be many more such habits that must be identified and confronted in order to effectively break free from them. Such people must be treated with compassion and respect, as their behaviour is often indicative of an underlying struggle. Therapy is usually recommended to help them work through their issues, and give them the tools to cope in healthier ways.
Shivani Misri Sadhoo is an internationally recommended relationship Counsellor by world’s biggest and most trusted study and research-based foundation for couples therapy – Gottman Institute. She is trained on specialised key relationship counselling Skills from AIIMS, VIMHANS and various other reputed institutions. Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo, is also Certified for Emotionally Focused Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy.
Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo is also a Certified Neuro Linguistic Practitioner with specialised training and experience in the field of affairs/betrayals, trust issues, difficulty communicating, conflicting values, bereavement, grief and loss (affairs, separation, divorce, childhood) and emotional health issue (anxiety, social anxiety, fear, depression, low mood).
Currently, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is one of the top counsellors with the HIGHEST Success Rate with over 17,000 happy couples and individuals (based in India and abroad), who has benefited from her therapy. Psychologist and Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo not only practice independently from her clinic in Greater Kailash, Delhi, India but also listed on the panel of eminent hospitals like IBS Hospital – Institute of Brain & Spine, Express Clinic, Fortis (formerly) based in Delhi.
