How Toxic Relatives Can Strain Your Marriage – And What Helps

Marriage is more than the bond between two people; it is influenced by families, culture, and social circles. While supportive relatives can strengthen a marriage, toxic relatives—those who overstep boundaries, criticise, or manipulate—can create tension and conflict. These influences can affect communication, trust, and intimacy, putting stress on even the strongest partnerships.

Understanding the ways toxic relatives impact a marriage, and the strategies that help mitigate their influence, is essential for maintaining harmony and resilience. Explains Shivani Misri Sadhoo, a leading marriage and family therapist and famous marriage counsellor in Delhi and India.

How do toxic relatives affect a marriage?

How do toxic relatives affect a marriage?

Toxic relatives can have a subtle but profound impact on a couple’s relationship. They often interfere in decisions, criticise one spouse, or manipulate family dynamics, causing stress and tension. Their behaviour can erode trust and make partners feel unsupported or isolated. Repeated exposure to these patterns can lead to emotional fatigue, resentment, and distance in the marriage.

Constant Interference

When relatives offer unsolicited advice or question decisions about finances, parenting, or personal choices, it can spark disagreements between spouses. This interference often leaves couples frustrated and feeling pressured to defend their choices.

Eroding Boundaries

Relatives who overstep limits—showing up uninvited, criticising a spouse, or trying to control decisions—can create tension and resentment. When boundaries are not respected, it can leave one partner feeling unsupported or undervalued.

Emotional Stress

Persistent criticism, manipulation, or conflict with relatives can cause anxiety, exhaustion, and emotional strain. This stress affects communication and intimacy, making it harder for partners to connect or resolve disagreements calmly.

Undermining Trust

When one partner feels left to handle difficult relatives alone, it can erode trust and emotional security. This makes the couple more vulnerable to misunderstandings and internal conflicts.

how to protect your marriage from toxic relatives?

What strategies help—and how do they help?

Addressing toxic relatives effectively requires thoughtful strategies that protect the marriage while maintaining necessary family relationships. Implementing these strategies strengthens trust, communication, and emotional connection between spouses.

Setting Clear Boundaries

Discussing and agreeing on what behavior is acceptable from relatives helps reduce conflict. Clear boundaries protect the couple from interference and reassure each partner that their perspectives are valued.

Staying United as a Couple

Presenting a consistent front when dealing with family shows relatives that the couple is a team. This unity prevents manipulation and reinforces trust, making the marriage more resilient to external pressures.

Open Communication

Sharing feelings honestly and discussing how relatives’ behavior affects the relationship prevents resentment. Open dialogue ensures that both partners feel supported and enables joint strategies for handling difficult situations.

Limiting Exposure

Reducing interactions with particularly toxic relatives or controlling the time spent with them provides emotional relief. Limiting exposure allows couples to focus on their relationship and restore harmony.

Seeking External Support

Counseling or support groups offer guidance on managing family dynamics effectively. External support helps couples develop practical coping strategies, improving communication and reducing stress.

Conclusion

Toxic relatives can quietly create stress, conflict, and emotional distance in a marriage. However, couples who recognise the impact of these behaviours and implement strategies such as setting boundaries, staying united, communicating openly, limiting exposure, and seeking external support can protect and strengthen their relationship. These approaches help reduce conflict, reinforce trust, and foster intimacy, allowing marriages to thrive even amid challenging family dynamics. By prioritising the marital bond and addressing external pressures thoughtfully, couples can maintain a strong, resilient partnership.

Check out the Video on How to Cut Toxic Family Ties